Help your teen to survive their suicidal thoughts

Suicide : Facts & Figures

I just want to kill myself.

I will just end it, once and for all.

Nothing can prepare you for the heartbreaking moment when you learn that your teen is suffering with thoughts of suicide.

It may seem like typical teenage drama or attention-seeking behavior, but it should be taken seriously anytime you hear your teen being preoccupied with death or openly talking about death. Having a discussion with a suicidal teenager can feel like walking on eggshells. Finding the right words to convey empathy, support, and understanding is crucial.

Here are some practical ways to help your teenager with suicidal thoughts:

#1 - Expressing Concern

Start by choosing a quiet, private setting for the conversation where your teen feels comfortable opening up. Express your worry in a gentle and caring manner. Ask questions and let your ward know that you’ve noticed changes in their behavior or mood, and that you’re there to listen and help. It may be useful to say something like this, what is going on? I want you to know that I'm here for you, and you can talk to me about anything that's on your mind.

#2 - Active listening

Listen to your teen without judgment or interruption. Steer clear of offering quick fixes. Avoid saying something like, this happens to everyone at your age or you’re overthinking this. Instead validate their feelings and let them know that it’s okay to feel the way they do. Use phrases like “I’m here for you” or “I’m sorry you’re feeling this way” to show empathy and understanding. Reflect what they’re saying to show that you understand.

#3 - Confidentiality

Assure your teen that you will respect their privacy and wont talk about this without their consent. This can help them feel more comfortable talking to you.

#4 - Asking Direct Questions

Be straightforward and sensitive while talking to them. Ask your teen if they’re having thoughts of hurting themselves or if they’ve made any plans to do so. It may help to ask, tell me more about these thoughts or plans?

A history of self-harm is one of the most established risk factors for eventual death by suicide (Beautrais, 2003).

Let them know that you are worried and concerned about them and you love them deeply.

#5 - Removing Access to Means

The common patterns reported for attempting suicide involves experiencing an interpersonal stressor, leading to distorted thoughts and intense emotions, with easy access to means or impulsivity as the final triggers (Balaji et al., 2023).

Remove the means of self-harm, such as medications, chemicals, or sharp objects. Ensuring their safety is key.

#6 - Creating a Safety Plan

Work with your teen to come up with a safety plan outlining steps to take if they’re feeling overwhelmed or in crisis. Include emergency contacts, coping strategies, and ways to access professional help.

Crisis / Suicide prevention helpline (24/7) - 1.Vandrevala Foundation -9999666555  2. Fortis -  8376804102

#7 - Professional Help

Let them know that there are trained professionals who can provide them with the tools and support they need to cope with their feelings.

Teen suicide risk factors encompass psychiatric conditions (such as depression, anxiety, substance dependence), experiences of bullying, interpersonal challenges, and academic pressure etc. (Centers for disease control and prevention, 2024). 

#8 - Keeping the Conversation Going

Check in with your teen regularly to see how they’re feeling and coping. Let them know that you’re always available to talk and that you’re committed to supporting them through their struggles.

#9 - Being Patient

Recovery is not a straight road, so be patient with your teen. Celebrate small victories and their effort along the way and remind them that you’re proud of their progress.

#10 - Seeking Support for Yourself

Supporting your teen through their emotional challenges can be overwhelming, so it's important to take care of yourself. Seek support from friends, family, or a therapist to help you cope with the challenges you’re facing.

Summary

Supporting your teen plagued by suicidal thoughts is never easy, but with patience, empathy, and warmth, you can provide the support they need to steer through this difficult time. Seek professional help if necessary to ensure their safety and well-being. Supporting and loving your teen can make all the difference in his or her recovery.

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References:

Balaji, M., Mandhare, K., Nikhare, K., Shah, A. K., Kanhere, P., Panse, S., Santre, M., Vijayakumar, L., Phillips, M. R., Pathare, S., Patel, V., Czabanowska, K., & Krafft, T. (2023). Why young people attempt suicide in India: A qualitative study of vulnerability to action. SSM - Mental Health, 3(1), Article 0216. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.ssmmh.2023.100216

Beautrais, A. L. (2003). Subsequent mortality in medically serious suicide attempts: a 5 year follow-up. Australian & New Zealand Journal of Psychiatry, 37(5), 595-599.

Centers for disease control and prevention(CDC). Suicide Prevention. [Internet]. 2024. Available from: https://www.cdc.gov/suicide/risk-factors/?CDC_AAref_Val=https://www.cdc.gov/suicide/factors

/index.html

World Health Organization (WHO). Suicide. [Internet]. 2019. Available from: https://www.who.int/health-topics/suicide#tab=tab_2

World Health Organization (WHO).Suicide. [Internet]. 2021. Available from: https://www.who.int/news-room/fact-sheets/detail/suicide 

National Crime Records Bureau (NCRB). Accidental Deaths & Suicides in India. [Internet]. 2021. Available from: https://ncrb.gov.in/sites/default/files/ADSI-2021/adsi2021_Chapter-2-Suicides.pdf